Single White Female in 2010 Saturday, Nov 13 2010 

At 24, I am learning for the first time about being single and independent. I was one of those girls that met a nice guy when I was still in High School, and managed to stay with him for over five years before coming to the abrupt realisation that not only had I changed completely, but what I wanted in life had too. So after much soul searching, I decided to fly solo.

Now, there are plenty of single girls like me out there, right? Well, not in my life. Basically, all of my girlfriends are gorgeous, funny, successful and sexy biatches – hence they were snapped up quickly by their smart thinking boyfriends. So being single is as much a mind-boggle to them as it has been for me. They have been wonderful (I have played the happy third wheel on many, many occasion), but at the end of the day, I don’t have anyone to go home to. I don’t have that person to cuddle with on the couch whilst watching some inane soppy movie, or to argue with. (“I want you to WANT to do it!”.)

And you know what?

I bloody love it. Don’t get me wrong, I am a woman, so I have certain white-knight type fantasies. (Lets face it – It’s in my DNA) I watch Katherine Heigl movies and get lost in the romance, see old people holding hands on the street and utter a soft “Awww!”. But at the same time, I am 100% enjoying getting to know ME.

Instead of basing my life around someone else, I have been able to do the things for myself I never would have done before. Meet new friends and put in the needed effort to make them integral parts of my life, try new cafes every week, stay up late watching reruns of Will & Grace, hell – even dye my hair pink! Suddenly a whole world was open to me, where the only person who’s permission or judgement meant anything was my own. (I tend to shut out my Mothers voice during these times.)

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying being single is better. I am merely saying that for ME, it has given me the opportunity to figure out who I am (Queue the cheesiness!). To find out what I really do and don’t like. To develop independence in everything I do, think and feel. My friendships have flourished, I have become happier, and my wardrobe is MUCH better now that I don’t have a guy telling me I should be budgeting. (Although my best guy friend has taken it upon himself to take on THAT particular role.) 😉

Now, I consider myself single, but that doesn’t mean I live in a Nunnery. And that’s the other great thing about not being tied down to one person – experimenting with dating different men and figuring out what works and what doesn’t. (I sound like a kid in a candy shop here, don’t I? Hmm..) But seriously – dating has been fun. I have been lucky, and not met any freaks or psychos, and taken something from each tryst. And I will continue to do this, until I either meet “The One”, or give up entirely and go live with my four cats and gay best friend (though sadly has more luck with men than I).

So my lesson for 2010 is: being single is wonderful, and a great love story all of its very own. Me, myself and I.

Tribute To The Best Friends A Girl Could Have Monday, Aug 9 2010 

Throughout life, there is one thing that gets you through the ups and downs. That helps you sift through self-doubt, heartbreak and confusion. That pulls you back up onto your feet when you stumble and just can’t get up by yourself. Friends.

Totally cheeseball, I know. I sound like a wannabe Hallmark card that didn’t quite make the cut – but all that aside, I mean it.

Over the past couple of years, I have been through a gamut of things. The family business burnt down, one of my closest friends passed away, I was hit by a car while riding home on my scooter, I ended a 5+ year relationship – could be worse, but hell, could have been a hell of a lot easier as well. And today? I’m actually a stronger and better person… due to my friends.

My group of friends is a mix. There is my core group of girls, five of us in total, and their respective partners. Then I have other friends, individuals from my High School days, work, or just acquired through circumstance. Every single one of these beloved people have shown my why it’s worth getting up in the morning.

When you have a terrible accident like I did, you expect people to all come running in the first few days, then just as quickly vanish with mumbled well-wishes. Which, in a way, I understand. Just because one persons life has stopped, doesn’t mean everybody else’s has to too. But my experience was quite the opposite. Over the three months of being in Hospital, I was never alone. I constantly had company, support, and lots of treats! I had friends take days off work and sit with me during the tough days, and every single night I had everyone turn up for a group dinner by my bedside. You have no idea how much this meant to someone who felt like their entire life had been snatched away, at least for the foreseeable future.

And, just as importantly, these amazing people have continued to grace me with the kind of friendship I know for a fact most people don’t get to experience in their lifetime. I do not spend one night at home unless I want to. If I have a problem that I cannot fix, help is always offered. My ramblings are always listened to, my hurts understood, my achievements celebrated.

You get what you give in life – and the fact I have such a wonderful “chosen family” makes me feel accomplished in myself. I must be doing something right if I have retained such relationships.

To all of those people – you know who you are – I thank you, and I love you.

*Right, no more drinking for me, I get overly emotional! OVER AND OUT!*

You just can't beat good friends...